Well, I have finished my first semester as a missionary! Phew! I have learned an awful lot about myself, about God, about people, about life... Here are just a few things (15 to be exact) that I can think of while I sit here, procrastinating doing some MPD (Mission Partner Development - aka fund-raising):
1. Missionaries are needed! I mean, really needed! Especially in New York, where the world views and the mindsets are so far from God it's incredible. But nothing is impossible for God.
2. I like cities. It's fun to live in NYC. I like all the people around all the time. I like the walking and Subway riding. But there are definitely moments where I miss my mountains and stars!
3. I am so so so blessed to have been shown the love God has for me. Where would I be if He had not summoned me?
4. I stink at communicating my feelings, and I hate confronting issues. That's not good when you're on a very small team.
5. God's plan is greater than my plan. His ideas are better, more creative, more successful, and bring about more good than mine ever could.
6. I can be outgoing if I try.
7. The devil is real. And he doesn't like missionaries. He's a sneaky little coward, too.
8. If I get rejected, it means I'm doing something right.
9. The answer is always, always love. Love God. Love you neighbor. Love God by loving your neighbor. Love at any cost to yourself, including your pride and your comfort. But first and foremost, you must be loved by Love, Himself.
10. Without community and support, we become weak. Without prayer, we have no fuel.
11. I still don't really know what I'm doing.
12. God answers prayers. He has done so in such concrete ways for me this semester.
13. I have been coming to a better understanding of how deep and penetrating God's love is. He has shown me so much more of Himself, and I am so thankful.
14. I have learned just how weak my faith really is. I still do not trust Him with everything. I still won't give Him all. I have learned how much I need Him.
15. Lastly, everything is a reflection of God's mercy. A dear friend has been sharing a lot about his experience with Mercy, and he passed this little nugget from Curtis Martin (FOCUS founder) on to me. At first I didn't understand, but the more I pray, the more true and real it becomes. God is always trying to draw us closer to Him, through every little thing that happens in our lives. He wants us so much, that in every moment - be it one of pain or struggle or joy - He is revealing His love for us. How little we notice. He showers me with gifts every moment of every day, and I don't even think twice. I deserve none of it, yet in His mercy He pursues me. I know Love because He is merciful. Everything is a reflection of that mercy.
Thank you for the prayers! I wouldn't be here without them!
Oh, and one more thing I learned - I stink at blogging! Sorry!
